Upon returning from a walk with the dog, I came into the house with my 19 month old daughter, and headed straight for the bathroom.
It's all the water I drink on those walks.
I was yapping on the phone to my BFF and my daughter was wandering around the house, as she does.
I soon realized, I did not hear her.
Which quickly became, I could not find her.
I look at the patio door, and find that it is open a cat's width (to allow them free access while we were gone) and suddenly panic grips my heart.
In my rational mind, I am thinking, there is no way on God's green earth she could've squeezed through that space.
In my child-abduction mind, I am thinking, she squeezed out and is now in the back seat of a 1979 Chevelle, hurtling towards I-76 and I am never going to see her face again.
In my rational mind, I am thinking, even if she did squeeze out, how would she get the gate to the fence open?
In my child-abduction mind, I am thinking she squeezed out of the same spots the dog squeezes out of.
I race outside with the dog, who, mind you, is going nuts. I think she is trying to do a Lassie, and alert me to my daughter's location.
Together we are running all over the backyard, the pallets, the pavers, the JUNK that is all over the place, I am cursing my out-of-shape body that I am so winded and not in the best physical condition to locate a missing child.
I am wimpering into the phone to tell my BFF to get over here and help me find her like NOW!!! because I really can't find her.
I check the bathroom in the man cave and can not open the door because the bottom drawer of the basin is open.
In my rational mind, I'm thinking, someone has got to be in that bathroom to open the drawer.
In my child-abduction mind, the cats have gotten in there and have opened the drawer and are sleeping comfortably while my baby is missing and gone across two state lines.
I check under every bed, closet, opening, portal, calling and calling and calling and SILENCE.
You know the feeling that your house is EMPTY ... well, that's the feeling I had.
I call 911.
As I am on with dispatch explaining the severity of the situation: my daughter has been missing for 3-5 minutes, the patio door was open, and I fear she's been abducted out of my yard, I check that man cave bathroom one. last. time.
As I am screaming her name into the bathroom, I suddenly see four wee fingers grasping the edge of the door, and pulling it inward.
And the biggest smile on her pudgy little face.
And that's when I burst into uncontrollable sobs, because she's here. She's here. She's here. She's here. I found her. She's here.
I have never felt such terror in my life (except the time my son went to play with the next door neighbor's kids and neglected to tell me and I couldn't find him either and nearly called 911 but called the neighbor instead -just in case- and he said, yes, he's here and I wanted to strangle him) and I never ever want to feel that terror again.
And yes, I already know I am a horrible mother, but thanks for asking.
What's the scariest thing your kids ever did to you or when have you been forced to call 911 but hopefully for a silly thing and not for something horrible and depressing.
35 comments:
Fortunately, I've never had to call. I do know the absolute panic of losing a child, but thank goodness they were found (in their brother's kindergarten classroom, next door) and I received a phone call from our neighbor, who worked at the school.
Glad everything was fine. Did you have to change undies?
The scariest thing my kids ever did to me?
I'm going to say 'asked for help with the book reports.'
I shudder to think of it.
Personally, I don't think that makes you a horrible mother.
Losing track of a little one who is exploring the world around her pales in comparison to anything you would see on Nancy Grace (hate the show, but my wife is a fan...).
There are monsters in this world who do awful things to their children intentionally. Leave the "horrible" label for those pieces of trash... just sayin'.
Not sure how reassuring this is coming from a random dude in Holland, MI, but that's my take on it.
I've never had that call 911 moment (and I hope it stays that way)
I would have been a terrified mess if I was in your situation! I'm glad she was just hiding in the bathroom.
Hate you went through it but your description is spot on an I know that is exactly how my mind would have been reacting. So glad there is a happy ending!
Wow...what a day you had...I'm so happy she is okay...and you are not a horrible mom....I left my son on the bed one night after breast feeding...in my sleepiness thinking i put him back in his crib...the next morning I go in to get him up and he's not there...I totally freak...and there he was on the guest bed...sleeping away...so glad he didn't roll off....
I know that feeling! My son had gone out to ride his bike on the street just in front of our house. I would look out and see him, but then I didn't see him....I started walking and calling his name, looking for his bike...and I'm only in front of the next door neighbor's house and like you am thinking, he has been snatched! My legs were trembling, me heart was racing, but something kept me walking. Another house down, I saw the older man cutting grass, and there was my son, talking to him! I think I aged 10 years in those 15 minutes or so. I'm so glad your precious little one is fine and was just hiding....and I'm sorry what you went through!!!
I just started following both of your blogs, and you are very inspiring!
Very happy she is safe and sound.
Amazing description of the two minds ... bin there.
My 911 moment(s) have all turned out okay, but in the moment ... wow - so mind numbingly scary.
My baby "Shorty" has a way with getting herself hurt. My oldest never did. When Shorty was about 19 months old, she aspirated some fluid and choked. She wasn't breathing when I called 911. Thank holy heaven that she wound up vomiting violently as I was talking to the dispatcher and it cleared her airway - but man ... it was so scary. She did it to me again about 6 months later only this time, she choked on a sticker. Little booger-knot.
My baby sister was the exact same way ... and they share a birthday ... weird, no?
When my son was 4 he ran away from me after an Orioles game in Baltimore. He was missing for about 25 minutes before a stranger found him and sent him over to a police officer. I was SO SCARED!
My oldest sun had a thing for running when he was two. It was seriously like chasing a dog who gets a taste of freedom when not on a leash and you have to spend 30 minutes trying to tackle them in the neighborhood. One morning in Arizona, my MIL, my SIL, myself and Ethan decided we would go to breakfast at Denny's and then take a trip to the zoo. This particular Denny's happened to be on the access road next to the interstate. Ethan was holding my SIL's hand about 30 feet in front of me when he broke free and darted onto the access road. In my 'OMG my baby is about to die mind' I started FREAKING THE HELL OUT and ran screaming toward the road. My SIL ran into the street and grabbed him. My MIL was screaming. When my SIL handed him to me I thought my heart was going to explode. I cried. A lot. Scariest moment of my life.
I think you're a good mom. (<-- How 'bout you and your daughter celebrating that wonderful "that" --and her "homecoming"-- over some ice cream? You deserve a major motherhood toast!) I like stories that end happily ever after.
sheesh! I'm glad it had a happy ending.
Last summer my Eldest slammed his finger in the front door. And damn near took the tip off. It was quickly followed by one of those "I'm hugely panicking but trying to act very cool and in control so as not to freak him out but DANG his finger tip is hanging off and I better drive to the Emerg REALLY fast before he passes out" kind of reactions.
We lost my stepson once. My hubs (boyfriend at the time) was running all over his house yelling for him. We were outside yelling and freaking out. And were on the verge of 911. My hubs was crying. Then we see the couch move. It was a pull-out and was half-way put up. The son had wanted to sleep on it the night before. He had wriggled in the mattress fold and was hiding. He had been in there the whole time listening to us freak out and cracking up. He was only 4 at the time. Little shit.
OHMYGOSH. That's so scary! My heart was pounding too! And not because I just guzzled a whole Diet Coke.
I've never had to call 911 but I have called Poison Control once for finding black gunk from our water heater in my daughter's mouth.
I haven't had a 911 moment with my kids, but have called before when I was positive that someone was breaking into my home in the middle of the night. There wasn't an intruder, but my dog did make me feel like an idiot when she barked like mad at the police officers who came to check out the house & yard. And no, she hadn't barked at the "intruder"...because there wasn't one. Ugh!
This one time my oldest (who was 4 at the time) and I went to visit my parents. Their yard wasn't fenced in. My dogs decided to wander off and he followed them. He was missing for HOURS. I was having super panic attacks. Call the po-po and they tell me that someone had called in saying they found a boy about a mile down the road at a construction site. Worst Mommy day ever. Except the time when he was about 10 months old and fell out of a two story window. Thats a story for another day.
We were in the backyard and I accidentally left the gate open, after watering the flowers in the front, and after a few minutes of talking w/ Josh I said, "where's Audrey?" I ran to the side and KNEW she had gotten out. Sure enough, at about the same age as yours, she was toddling down the road, with my garden gloves on, AND A TRUCK SLOWLY FOLLOWING HER!
Another time I locked myself out of the house, while watering the flowers, BOTH KIDS WERE INSIDE IN THEIR HIGHCHAIRS! I had to flag down a driver to use their phone to call Josh...
Then one time the kids were wrestling and Jacob fell back on Audrey, it looked like she hit her head. I picked her up AND SHE PASSED OUT IN MY ARMS! THAT is the time I called 911, and the firemen were more intent on treating me than her; turns out she got the wind knocked out of her, no head injury.
I got more but I am starting to feel like a REALLY bad mother, and Mother's Day is coming... *SOB*
I remember losing my son at Disney World when my back was turned for a second. He wandered off. That was the worst 5 minutes of my life as I raced to find him. Poor kid. When he realized he was lost he was just as panicked as I. The joy when we found eachother was overwhelming and reduced each of us to tears.
Pretty sure you are NOT the most horrible mother on the planet... there are a bunch of cracked out crazies who take that rank so simmer down ;)
I HATE that feeling though... and it is scary. It's crazy how fast life can change in an instant right?!
SO glad that she is okay and that it was just a false alarm. Squeeze our babies extra hard after something like that happens!!
*Hugs*
That is absolutely the worst possible feeling. When Big and I were at the grocery store once, I put him in one of those car carts. I turned to get a wipe to wipe down the cart, and I guess Big took that time to get out of the cart.
Well, I didn't know so I began shopping. The cart felt light, but I had been working on my anxiety and wasn't going to give in. I had put him in the cart, and that is where he was, dammit. Even if he was eerily quiet and still and light.
Finally, I gave in and looked down to see him NOT in the cart. I grabbed my purse and took off, screaming his name. When I got back to the front of the store, there he was with the security guard, just like I always told him to do, but he was trying to run back out the front doors because he was sure I had left him there and wanted to go check the car. Thank goodness they don't let four-year-olds do that. I ran up and grabbed him and thanked them for saving him and tried to convince them I wasn't a crack mom, but I don't think they believed me.
Had similar experience of my 20 month old (then 18 mo old) close bathroom door and then open a drawer (drawer to slim to have child proof locks on it) that essentially blocked bathroom door from being opened more than a half inch. I thought no problem I'll get broomstick or something and close. It was too thick and while I could see her in the bathroom mirror the whole time bee bopping around turning on the bathtub and trying to flush the toilet, I kept saying 'Julia, close the drawer' like she's going to know! I ended up busting down the door "fireman" style and by that time (a whole 3-4 mins later) she was crying because she heard the panic in my voice. The door cracked perfectly so it was fine to stay broken for awhile...just finally got around to having a friend look to replace it for me this past week. Such a terrible pit-in-your-stomach feeling, I know it well. I was seconds away from calling 911 myself but luckily channeled my inner Denis Leary to get the job done. One of my friends said she used to keep some kind of tool (one that you could take off door hinges with)on top of her air cond controls when her kids were little. I'm thinking of trying that!
oh man, we all have those heart stop moments, but thank God she's ok.
My daughter hasn't really done this yet, but I still remember the time *I* did this. At my Grandma's. I don't know how old I was - probably 6 or 7. I was playing in the backyard and saw another little kid outside a few doors down, so I went to go play with her. My grandma couldn't find me. She yelled for me (apparently), but I never heard her. I came back awhile later and can still remember getting in A LOT of trouble. I don't know if she didn't call 911 because it was the 80's and the world seemed safer or, more likely, because she raised her kids in the 40's. And the world was safer.
No 911 calls, except for The Husband... Scariest thing from a kid... I was picking up the 3-year-old from preschool and she bolted from me -- right in front of a moving car. I couldn't reach her, but another mom grabbed the hood on her jacket and yanked her back. My daughter was fine. But about 2 dozen people asked me if *I* was okay!!
I've never had to call 911 but I did lose my child at an amusement park one time. I was not amused.
Holy crap woman. He heart stopped while reading this...and I don't even have kids, so I can't totally relate, but wow, that must have been so scary. Glad she was just in the bathroom and not 2 states away.
I've never had to call but a friend did about a month ago. She was getting her 23month old ready for bath time and didn't close the door behind her as the tub filled. Her Daughter went into the bathroom and locked herself inside. The water in the tub was running and her husband was at a night class so she was home alone. It took about 10 minutes for the fire dept to get there and turn off the water as she didn't know how to do it herself. The tub overflowed and everything flooded but it all turned out ok in the end. Everyone was crying but all were safe. Now the door doesn't lock.
My son learned how to crawl out the doggie door around 8-9 months. Kids are crazy.
Fortunately, I've never had to call 911 for something to do with my children. But I have had small heart attacks caused by them and then had to seriously consider calling it on myself. Does that count?
I really do hope, for your sake, that the next time you have blog block that it doesn't take panic surrounding thoughts of child abduction to get your creative juices moving again.
I did that to my parents in a mall in Scotland when I was 5. They were, shall we say, not pleased.
You poor thing! I would have freaked too!!! Thankfully I have never had to call 911 (and I hope I never do) but I do have poison control on speed dial. Does that make me terrible?
Eeekkk!!! I haven't called 911 yet but my heart stops every time I go into my son's room after he "goes to sleep" to check on him, and he's hiding in the closet and I'm scanning the room so hard looking for him, that my eyes begin to cross and I get all hot & panicky....and then he jumps out laughing. KIDS.
Glad you found her! I panic that much when I can't find the dog, but they frown on calling 911 for that.
I had that moment about a month ago. So f-in scary!
oh my gosh- i can only imagine the panic you must have felt. i almost have a heart attack when i accidentally wake up 10 mins late, so losing a child must be a pretty big deal!
Oh I can feel your soul wrenching fear right through the computer!
This happened to me once. We were at a park. I let my kids run at the park. My daughter was off playing (she was 8) with her two older brothers. About 20 minutes passed and the boys came back to our "base" ... without daughter. They had no idea where she was. I ran around looking for her, screaming her name, had other parents at the park screaming her name. At the 7 minute mark, (I know because I was keeping a hawk eye on my watch) as I was about to call the police...she comes strolling up to me. Apparently she had been sitting under a tree, picking dandelion...which she handed to me with a smile. It took me almost an hour to stop crying.
YOu poor thing! How scary!
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